On Becoming an Ask-Kicker

While my friend and colleague has little background in Nonviolent Communication (NVC), her blog speaks directly to intuitively connecting with needs alive in her and the growth opportunities inherent in making requests. Please enjoy this guest post by Kelley A. Joyce from The Truth at Work.

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I am truly blessed to have so many wonderful friends, family, and colleagues.

In the 10+ years that I’ve lived in New York City, my personal and professional network of talented, smart, and inspiring people has simply exploded on a global level. To not have known even a single one of my trusted friends is unthinkable to me now. We give and take and grow together in the no-rehearsal show we call life.

But lately I’ve been deeply troubled and scared on an emotional level to boldly go after what I want for my business. I sheepishly surrendered last week (more like waved the white flag) to the process of learning to do more and bigger Asks from the powerful network I nurture on a daily basis.

I could taste my tremendous fear of rejection mixed with the overwhelm of receiving what I want. It was a painful polarity of the fear of success and failure at the same time. But it was so obvious that the future growth of my company hinged upon my ability to ask for what I need.

I challenged myself to a quota of 3 Asks per day. Gulp. This target loomed like a dark shadow. I wasn’t even sure of where to start, but I had a jam-packed week and a forecast to meet. Nothing like a deadline to set me in motion!

So, I just started asking…

• My fellow Fordham MBA alum for a sales conversation with his HR team
• My business associate to use his conference room to conduct a client meeting
• My cousin to be my sales coach and mentor
• My clients for feedback on process improvement and return-on-investment
• My coaching colleagues to create a referral network
• My sales prospects for exactly the rate that I want to work for
• My close guy friend for a potential love-connection with his best friend (sadly he’s taken)

And do you know what?! They all showed up for me in full-force. Every single one of them over-delivered in wonderfully surprising ways (well, except for my love-connection) and asked what else they can do to support me!

Here’s what I discovered:

• I network more often and successfully than I think I do
• My secret sauce is to remember to Ask in the moment
• Right now, Asking is easier for me than being open to receiving what I want
• I’m most sharp when I use my intuition to put needs + Asks together
• Asking and receiving go hand-in-hand
• A genuine request is met with a generous response

I’m well on the road to becoming a world-class Ask-Kicker. This is a practice that I intend to perfect.

While I’m at it, I’m going to Ask you to attend my upcoming workshop “Intuition at Work” on Sunday, July 28th at the Meta Center in New York. I will be co-facilitating with my friend and intuitive coach Emilah Dawn DeToro. Don’t miss this chance to learn how to tap into your intuition for your business advantage. Register here for the Early Bird rate.

What do you need to ask for in your business & life? Who will you ask for support?

This post first appeared on Kelley’s Joyce‘s website/blog The Truth at Work.