For the first time in weeks, I slept for 10 hours. Eleven if you also count the hour I slept on the couch after Jacob massaged my aching, plantar fasciitis feet before getting myself into bed.
Despite my meowing senior cat who woke me to demand some attention, I slept soundly. I think I am finally over the hump of moving back to Santa Fe and into a home with Jake again. It was a bumpy and yet satisfying transition learning to live together in a different way – with more space between us so I can stay connected to myself and Sanat Kumara, the being I channel.
Connecting to My Channel
I’ve been connected to Sanat Kumara for over a decade. I first “met” him while providing administrative support to a woman who channeled him. Over the course of the months that I worked for her, I came to align my frequency to him.
I would sit and meditate with big hunks of Celestite – a stone that is said to be the color of his eyes. I began to hear him more and more often in my head.
My previous guide, Shivananda Saraswati (Swami Shivananda) – the Ayurvedic physician who I “met” at Ananda Ashram when his face (looking a bit like Mr. Clean) flashed in front of my mind’s eye before my body received shaktipat from him – had recently signed off. And it seemed that Sanat Kumara was my next teacher and guide.
For several months I worked with him, maybe a year, culminating in a full-body channeling of him during a winter solstice circle with dear friends. That was when I knew I was fully attuned to his frequency and the integration of it into my being was underway.
A Daily Presence
His frequency runs in the background of almost all I do these days. It supports my intuitive readings and he, along with the clients’ guides, directs the energy work that happens during Energy Body Alignment sessions. When I am coaching, his frequency is more integrated with my worldly experience and training.
Between the years 2014-2020, he felt much less present. I was living more fully in the world – working for the Unity Church and Southwestern College. While he was guiding me through it, I leaned more on my human capacities for administration, coaching, and advising.
But as soon as those days were over, he started to reappear and request fuller integration. I’ve been hearing for over a year that he would become more prominent in my work, and it seems that time has arrived.
Embracing the Integration
The 10 weeks in Tucson, mostly alone, helped with the integration. Daily meditation, solo time in nature, and no other energy in the house allowed me to integrate his frequency more fully than I had been willing to in the past.
I can feel the difference in my intuitive readings and Energy Body Alignment – and in myself as well. I am more integrated, I stand more powerfully in my and our combined frequency. I am surer of myself. I can distinctly sense when the frequency is running in the background and when it/he has moved forward to influence sessions or my creative work. It’s remarkable.
Keeping this focus and integration while living with another human, two senior cats, and two dogs is quite a feat! I still need significant time alone.
I sleep alone most nights. I meditate alone in the early mornings (usually 5 a.m.). I eat carefully and in ways that support my body’s capacity to channel (simple, well-cooked foods that are easy to digest). I require 7-8 hours of sleep a night. Movement is important, although elusive right now as I heal a bone spur.
This is the way of the householder in the Vedic texts. A person who is living a deeply spiritual life in the midst of their day-to-day responsibilities in the world. It is not the easiest of paths, but it is mine.
And I suspect it is yours, too, dear reader.
Find Your Own Peace
Although it is not everyone’s path to channel a being, we do all have a spiritual path of our own and specific gifts that are ours to cultivate and master. I believe it’s important to find your path and gifts and walk in the world with them.
It’s also important to face our resistance to our path, the judgments we have of it (it’s not as good as someone else’s; we aren’t worthy, etc.), and the envy of wanting someone else’s gifts.
Instead, try simply accepting what is ours to do, cultivate it, and walk our path with neutrality. I’m finding life fascinating, rewarding, and nourishing – now that I let go of what I think I ought to be doing and comparing myself to others.
Give it a try – maybe you’ll find the peacefulness you’ve been yearning for, too.
p.s. Curious about channeling? I recommend Sanaya Roman’s classic book Opening to Channel.